It's totally frustrating after an argument to have a great thing to say at the completely wrong time!

", "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you're an expert on my life and how I should live it. Where do we go from here?”. "Why don't you just slip into something more comfortable like a coma. These cookies do not store any personal information.

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"If you're gonna be a smartass, first you have to be smart. I may be fat, but you’re ugly, and I can lose weight.

Wanna hang out?”You: “I heard that you were a Ladykiller. Reply by a kindergartner, to a pair of 5th graders who tried to tell him Santa isn’t real: “Santa brings me presents, and if Santa doesn’t bring you presents, you should think about why.”, Female friend: “I’ll just meet a doctor and become a trophy wife.”, Male friend: “They don’t give trophies for last place”. If you're a Seinfeld fan, you'll remember George Costanza being insulted by his co-worker while George is eating shrimp during a work meeting. Simply know what the subject of your comeback will be.

40 Funny Quotes & One-Liners To Use When You Need The Perfect Comeback, - Our best articles delivered straight to your inbox, These 6 Personality Types Always Need To Have The Last Word — And Win Every Argument, The 50 Best Funny Quotes To Share With Your Most Hilarious Friends, 50 Funny, Positive Quotes To Help You Keep Your Chin Up​, Sorry Not Sorry! (Part 1). Witty comebacks can be a great social tool to utilize, so practice it as the skill that it is.

OK, maybe a little harsh. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured. What’s that ugly thing growing out of your neck… Oh… It’s your head….

How would you know? The sound of your urine hitting the urinal sounds feminine. Why are you bothering me? I heard your parents took you to a dog show and you won. Guys on Reddit have recounted stories with some of the rudest and meanest comebacks. You must have a very low opinion of people if you think they are your equals. I’m away live with it. In the case of snide remarks, if you know your colleague has a tendency to make them, train your brain to listen to his or her words carefully and be prepared to remark quickly to defuse the situation.

I’ve always wanted to meet your family. You are proof that evolution CAN go in reverse. What are you doing here? You’re so stupid, it takes you an hour to cook minute rice.

In life you will notice that a lot of people will talk a lot of crap to you. Remember JESUS loves you but everyone else thinks you’re an idiot.

"The best retorts speak truth — when a person calls something that the other people didn't see," said Paul. At least when I do a handstand my stomach doesn’t hit me in the face.
Focus your skills on acknowledging subjects which are worth zeroing in on and poking fun at. Hate me because your boyfriend thinks so. If I wanted to kill myself I’d climb your ego and jump to your IQ. I have my away message on cause I don’t want to listen to you and your stupid nonsense. The trick to filling in the blanks of your comeback is to be fully confident in what you think of the situation at hand. You’re so ugly, when you got robbed, the robbers made you wear their masks.

Looks like you traded in your neck for an extra chin! Hi, I’m Bryn and I created this site to help people with comebacks for verbal bullies and to find the right words in difficult situations. The most important factor to an effective and witty verbal comeback is the amount and quality of ‘ammo’ that you have. You need to be quick on your feet when delivering a comeback, and with the general approach of your comeback planned out beforehand, it’ll come time to impress the audience. Are you always this creepy or tonight you’re making a special effort?”, Man: “Would you like to go back to my place or yours?”You: “Well, I don’t know.

Send us a message. Thinking Of Something To Say After An Argument Is Over Is The Worst Feeling. You are depriving some poor village of its idiot. You were boring me to death and my survival instincts kicked in.

Powered by  - Designed with the Hueman theme, 7 Best Clean Comebacks For Bullies And Jerks, Good Comebacks You Can Use In An Argument Today, Video With Some Funny Insults From The Movies. Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?

Will it be alright if I ignore you right now? Which way did you come in? The key to coming up with a winning retort is to hone your listening skills so that you can respond at lightning speed. ... That witty comeback text ALMOST marks the end of today’s article. Someone was trashing on a user here on Reddit while using awful punctuation.

Sandwiches aren’t only for eating and throwing at each other.

Please tell me you don’t home-school your kids. Sometimes you think of the ultimate retort — but two days later when you’ve had time to fume and consider a few choice words. Try this: “Sure, I’d love to help you out…now, which way did you come in?”, ~Do people trouble you about your outer appearance? Sign up to receive the latest and greatest articles from our site automatically each week (give or take)...right to your inbox. Your head is so big you have to step into your shirts. What is that?”You: “It’s called ‘Soap’. Poof be gone, your breath is too strong, I don’t wanna be mean, but you need Listerine, not a sip, not a swallow, but the whole frigging bottle. If your brain was made of chocolate, it wouldn’t fill an M&M. You’re as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle.

You’re so fat your shadow casts a shadow. They can only be made in the moment using the unexpected material you get from the other person by listening actively and precisely, experts say.

Then feel free to watch the funny video below or check out 35 funny Spongebob roasts, quotes, and jokes. I’d tell you how I really feel, but I wasn’t born with enough middle fingers to express myself in this case.

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Until you called me I couldn’t remember the last time I wanted somebody’s fingers to break so badly. Listening to others fully should thereby be viewed as beneficial to you because it gives you material for what you’re about to say next. I only yawn when I’m super fascinated. And if you're reading these funny quotes and hilarious insults, I'm sure you have too.

I have always wondered why people bang their heads against brick walls….. then I met you.

I would tell you to fuck yourself but then again you would be pretty disappointed. Substituting the details in the final stages of witty comebacks should be easy if your general shell stands on good solid ground. I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and shit out a smarter statement than that.

Comeback master Stephen Colbert isn't a bad place to start (Credit: Getty Images), Though it may be tempting to respond in kind, positive comments are a far better tool for keeping projects on track while showing your love of linguistic acrobatics.
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People will be much more open to what you have to say when you listen to their thoughts first. Your room is so dirty even bums refuse to live there. I was at the zoo.

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